


Beyond the Wall

by Queenofthebees



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Awkwardness, Crack Fic, F/M, Jon and the Starks Are Not Related, Jon doesn't know the Starks, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-30 15:57:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19406572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenofthebees/pseuds/Queenofthebees
Summary: As if the universe had decided to fuck Jon over for laughs, Theon’s door opened and a red-haired male stepped out.“I still can’t get hold of Sansa,” he muttered, pressing his phone to his ear again.Suddenly, Taylor Swift once again echoed across his apartment and Jon was honestly surprised everything next didn’t happen in slow motion like it did in the movies.The man, who Jon could only presume was Robb, turned towards the sound and then slowly raked his eyes over Jon’s half naked body, his modesty protected only by a sheet. And the state of his hair, the little moon shaped indents of Sansa’s nails on his shoulder meant there was no way of pretending he had just been sleeping innocently beside her. Slowly, Robb lowered the phone from his ear, not even looking as he hit the end call button.“Oh…well guess I don’t have to tell Robb anything,” Theon joked, pushing the door open with his butt and giving Jon a somber salute. “It was nice knowing you Jon.”“Um,” Jon said dumbly as Robb continued to stare silently.





	Beyond the Wall

Jon wasn’t used to waking in the morning with his body curled around another and the scent of fresh flowers and citrus assaulting his nostrils but he couldn’t say he would complain about it.

Sansa murmured softly as she turned, snuggling into his side. Jon smiled fondly and let his hand push her hair back from her face.

They had only been dating a short time, although he had wanted her ever since he had seen her on the university campus when she had come for White Harbour open day. They’d hit it off straight away and when he’d nervously asked if she would like to go on a date, she’d been hesitant, only because she lived in Winterfell and she hadn’t decided about university yet. But she liked him and had agreed to swap numbers and social media details to keep in touch.

She had ended up going to Kings Landing university but after a short time, she had a lot of bad experiences and she had decided to come back north. While she had been in the south, she and Jon had kept in contact and he had assured her that she was always welcome to come to White Harbour if she needed a change of scenery or to get away from everyone’s questions.

Although she had returned back to Winterfell with her family, she had said that she would still take him up on that date if he was single. And Jon was only a little embarrassed to admit how eager he had been to offer it again.

“Is it still raining outside?” Sansa mumbled sleepily, nuzzling into his chest.

“Can’t see,” he muttered back, reluctant to move from the warmth of the covers and Sansa’s body.

“Hmm…I figured if it was raining we’d be better just staying in bed,” she replied, shifting her head to give him a grin. “Keep each other warm, you know…”

“You know, I think I can hear raindrops,” he commented, already rolling her onto her back and swallowing her laugh with a kiss.

***

Theon had been nervous but excited at the opportunity to move to White Harbour for an internship. It wasn’t so much about missing home, he didn’t have a particularly good relationship with his family, but Asha.

But he missed being able to go for a pint with Robb and his siblings. But, it was what it was and he would be an idiot to waste the opportunity.

His neighbours weren’t too bad at least, although he didn’t see much of them. Jon was the one directly next door and they often exchanged pleasantries and sometimes Jon would knock on the door and ask for a shot of a lighter if he couldn’t find his and he was desperate for his smoke. And Theon would sometimes knock on Jon’s door for milk for his morning coffee when he had been working too late to get to the shops the night before.

Jon was a very good neighbour but the only complaint Theon had was the fact that the very thin walls made him feel as though he was part of a threesome when Jon had his girlfriend over. And the fact that Theon hadn’t had a date in weeks only made the noises beyond the wall even more irritating.

If Theon had really cared about what was going on, beyond slight jealous annoyance, he would have recognised the voice of the mysterious girlfriend. And despite what people thought about him liking drama, he most definitely would not have invited Robb to stay if he had known.

Before they went out, they had been having a couple of beers in the flat, catching up and reminiscing about their childhood. And the noises had drifted over, the grunting and the cries of a very pleased lady echoing around them.

“Well, someone is having fun,” Robb chuckled as Jon’s bed thudded against the wall in a steady rhythm.

“Tell me about it,” Theon grouched, taking an angry swig of his beer. “I figured they’ve only just started sleeping together and they’re still in the honeymoon phase. At it all hours whenever she is round there.”

“Jealous?” Robb teased. Theon snorted but it was a pointless attempt at nonchalance because Robb knew him better than anyone.

“Sure, I should have pulled loads of chicks by now,” he stated with a shrug. “But maybe she’s faking it.”

Robb tilted his head. “I dunno, sounds pretty enthusiastic to me.”

“Hmm I suppose,” Theon agreed, frowning at the wall as the sounds kept drifting over. “Christ, I’m tired just listening to it. How is he still going?”

“I hope that girl doesn’t have plans for the weekend,” Robb laughed before he reached for his phone. “That reminds me, I need to check Sansa is coming back from her friend’s tomorrow in time for Dad’s surprise party. You’re still coming back with me right?”

Theon nodded around another swig of beer. “Sansa decided what she’s doing now?”

“She’s staying at Winterfell for now. But she’s kept in touch with a few of her uni friends, she’s staying with one of them tonight. She did say she’d be back in time but its Sansa, she takes forever to get ready so I might call her and tell her the party is a hour earlier.”

“Alright, I’m going to grab my cigarettes and go for a smoke,” Theon commented, placing his bottle down and heading to his room. He noted thankfully that Jon and his girlfriend had finished. Maybe they’d go at least two hours this time before starting again he thought angrily as he grabbed his cigarettes.

Sighing after casting a look around his room, he noted that his lighter wasn’t anywhere to be seen. He lifted the pillows and tilted the bedside table but to no avail.

Well, he thought solemnly, at least Jon and his girlfriend were done so he was probably safe to go an ask for a lighter.

“Be back in a minute,” Theon mumbled to Robb as he walked past him through the living room. Robb nodded distractedly as he continued to wait for Sansa to answer her phone.

***

“You’re insatiable,” Jon chuckled as Sansa nuzzled at his neck, her fingers tracing a slow path down his chest and back up again, her knuckles drifting closer to the edge of the sheet that covered the bottom halves of their naked bodies. Jon could already feel his body responding with interest.

“Are you complaining?” she teased, throwing a leg over his own. Jon groaned as he felt the wet heat of her against his thigh.

“We’ve used all the condoms,” he sighed.

“The shop is open late,” she countered, flashing him a seductive smile. “Maybe I’ll run us a bath first…”

“Mmm…maybe I’ll get some wine then?”

“Trying to get me drunk to seduce me?” Sansa cried with mock indignation. Jon grinned, rolling himself on top of her.

His fingers found her sex, wet and wanting, and Sansa arched immediately into his touch with a soft sigh. He smirked as she parted her legs further, slipping a finger inside her.

Sansa’s phone started ringing on the bedside cabinet, blasting out Taylor Swift’s Shake It Off around the room. She turned her head slightly until Jon growled, pressing his thumb against her clit and circling gently to distract her.

“Ignore it,” he urged, pushing another finger inside of her. “They’ll call back if it’s important.”

She hummed softly, smiling up at him in acceptance.

The sudden knock at the door made him jump and Sansa tensed beneath him. Huffing, Jon leaned down to kiss her, starting the steady pumping of his finger again and determined to ignore the visitor.

“Jon? Is it cool to borrow your lighter?” Theon’s voice drifted through.

Sansa squeaked, shoving him away suddenly and causing him to throw his arms out to catch himself from falling off the bed.

“How the hell do you know Theon?” Sansa gasped, scrambling out of bed as Jon gave a bewildered blink.

“He’s my neighbour,” he said slowly, frowning in confusion as Sansa started pacing the floor and he really shouldn’t be thinking about how she is naked and instead he should focus on what was bothering her.

“He’s Robb’s best friend,” Sansa hissed. “My brother. My brother who thinks I’m with uni friends because if he knew I had a boyfriend, and was staying over at said boyfriend’s, he’d probably faint. He’s really, really protective of me.”

“Its fine,” Jon assured her. “Theon just wants a lighter so I’ll give him one and he’ll not see you so it’s cool.”

He wrapped the sheet around his lower body and grabbed his lighter from his bedside drawer before heading to the door.

“Finally dragged yourself away from her then?” Theon teased when Jon finally opened the door.

“What?”

“You really don’t realise how thin the walls are, do you?” Theon chuckled as he walked away, holding the lighter up behind him. “I’ll give this back in a minute.”

“Theon!” Jon called as his neighbour’s hand pressed the button to open the apartment building’s door. “Don’t tell Robb about this, please. We’ll tell him ourselves…well…not…that…but that we’re dating.”

Theon frowned. “Tell Robb what?”

As if the universe had decided to fuck Jon over for laughs, Theon’s door opened and a red-haired male stepped out.

“I still can’t get hold of Sansa,” he muttered, pressing his phone to his ear again.

Suddenly, Taylor Swift once again echoed across his apartment and Jon was honestly surprised everything next didn’t happen in slow motion like it did in the movies.

The man, who Jon could only presume was Robb, turned towards the sound and then slowly raked his eyes over Jon’s half naked body, his modesty protected only by a sheet. And the state of his hair, the little moon shaped indents of Sansa’s nails on his shoulder meant there was no way of pretending he had just been sleeping innocently beside her. Slowly, Robb lowered the phone from his ear, not even looking as he hit the end call button.

“Oh…well guess I don’t have to tell Robb anything,” Theon joked, pushing the door open with his butt and giving Jon a somber salute. “It was nice knowing you Jon.”

“Um,” Jon said dumbly as Robb continued to stare silently.

“Urgh, my brother called and then hung up on me,” Sansa’s voice grumbled from behind him. Jon turned towards her, panic rising as she wandered through the living room, naked as her name day and shot him a seductive smile. “Come back to bed and ravish me already.”

Jon stepped back quickly, pushing the door half shut and shielding the view into his flat with his body as Robb advanced.

“So, lovely to meet you,” Jon joked. “I’ll never see you again after this of course, because you’ll probably have me assassinated but, really, nice to meet you.”

“Jon?” Sansa questioned as he slammed the door shut and put the bolts on. Her phone started ringing again instantly and she gave it a puzzled look.

“Okay so…how do you feel about never leaving this place, ever?”

**Author's Note:**

> This is ...I have no words. Its pure idiotic crack lol. But, it helped me get back into the flow of writing for these (late) prompts I'm trying to finish so I guess its still important crack...


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